Monday, May 11, 2015

What ruins romantic affairs?

The jumping to conclusions is what ruins romantic affairs.  Never assume you know how things are between you and your lover as there is a danger you may be lost in your mind, where anything is possible and delusion is common!

It’s important to remain in the state of "not knowing" and to be open to what arises between you both, particularly when you are together, but also when you are apart.  Your perceptions will only be accurate when you are in this state of "not knowing", which ensures you are not lost in a mental dream where you already think you know how things are between you both and then impose this idea on the relationship.  Instead, by keeping your awareness poised and present in this state of "not knowing" you can pay attention to the feelings that arise between you both which tell you about the current state of the relationship and what may be required to improve it.

Subtle feelings are what signal truth, not thoughts about a subject, and to be open and aware of these subtle feelings we must be "out of our mind", meaning: not lost in thought!  This is difficult to do when we have spun a romantic dream around the subject of our lover.  This makes clear perception of the situation very difficult and this dream is fed by continual thinking about the lover with rose colored glasses.

To remain present and in touch with the true situation between us both we must not fall into a romantic dream.  Such a dream is likely to end in a rude awakening when reality fails to meet our romantic expectations, particularly when previous signs of emotional disconnection have been ignored or misread by us!

Sharka Todd

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